hurts so bad but feels so good. "ok alice take a deep breath, now exhale. go to that happy place" ::::POKE::::: (nipple nails)

things happen because they have to. no matter what. what is going on with humanity? the search for salvation is better then salvation itself, then what are you going to do for eternity? play stip checkers in perfect happiness. give me a gun and a bottle. i'll show you happiness. if you want to meat the kindest tree, twin buttes reservoir san angelo texas, bob a mesquite, where the fungal mistol toe grows on her branches.  

the empty.full. here. gone. death. birth. on. off. tra la la, day.  

right before i go to bed. i'm staring at the ceiling as my cory reccommened "clean cotton" yankee candle light plays a tune for the shadows dance. feeling very focused, intense just soaking in thought. the two lamp shadows creeping up the wall angling at the cieling look like a set of tires. candle flame now quickly ripping its light in short waves, engines running. i notice the flame move more sporatically, so much movement yet the shadows only slightly rumble. i now pay full attention to the flame thru my water baottle i see the silloette of a torso running, now two torso's one beside it as i try to focus both eyes on the flames distortion. running running. its like i'm watching a scene from a film, i get a little tense, whats going to happen? this goes on for minutes. suddenly the running holds still. half a minute and it begins violently onece more two silloettes running in sequence. i am intent on following the action my eyes blur and now thre are three silloettes jirating in sequence. lost track of the seconds keeping focus on the group. the three grow still the flame gets brighter and i take notice of the box patturn of light surrounding the three silloettes their still. i enjoy that outcome turn my head and fall asleep. 

i have my ambitions of life, like army ranger vet says you can say you want it, but you can just be talking shit, YOU DONT HAVE ANY STONES unless you DO IT. fo sho. 

we are all our own unique tiny snowflakes. billions fall. no two are the same, like the saying always goes. we fall from the sky and glide to the ground- "as the flurries fall and the earth stops moving" a thought i take from tracy's young girl h.s. track athlete. It sounds nice. The brief flight down thru the lower atmosphere, in comparison to their size it’s a rather amazing journey to the ground. but when they hit, then what. The tiny snowflakes ultimately have the similar fate they eventually melt, turn back to the water. H2O. Before that some get compacted into a tight ball of fury that rip thru the air and hit your blind brothers face. Some unfortunately melt prematurely from the hot urine shot to spell a name. A few fortunate ones land on the tip of beautiful ladies tongue. i could go on. It snowed yesterday while we were on the road. It made me think about that we are so unique we're not but we are.
 

it never fails to happen. i will rip the goodness out of your soul, its there i see it, no matter how dim faint weak it may be. i make satan crave to serve laddle fulls of boiled carrots at a homeless shelter, and love it, and smile with his wicked smile, and love it. oh yeah i do realize everytime i take the time to exorcisterate your goodness it weakens my own light, its ok the world will be traped in my darkness light fading, even my darkness is still good. it is all good because thats the way i want it to be. 

boy do i like taking pictures of myself. perhaps attempts to make sure i know i exist. this is just one of them nights were sleeping is not the thing to do. i'd probly cut my hair off for a stimulating conversation at this point in time, or a really good bra, every week i'm in a new state, tomorrow i'll be in a new country, the mission dodge the mounties and bring home cuban cigars. is love like catching butterflies? it seems so. two empty bottles of vodka on top of my hotel room tv set, they are dancing infront of me with out a care. the grey goose and three olives are inlove. not infront of my eyes bottles, mama's feelin alone. :(  

this early morning hour brings me a funereal thought processes. that flower that's so bright and beautiful still will wilt with the winter approaching. time will vanish us all. the sun needs to hurry up an ray on my face so i can remember what i look like out of the darkness. i'm an unlearned ghost of vain  

WHORE IT UP AND SWOON 

please ignore the whorey look and pig tales, mind you there was a beautiful beautiful soul inside a beautiful women who happend to like pigtales taking that photo, that is also my 6th cranberry-volka juice in my hand, look at the fucking awsome shit! best worth sun burn feeling ever. so many more to come.  

okay drew it up, nice and simple so the mo fo wont poke me to death with the vibrating needle. hopefully i can find a clean tat place today so i can get-r-done. 

Congratulations, Alice!
Your IQ score is 131
130 Physicians and Surgeons; Lawyers; Engineers (Civil and Mechanical)

This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the Classic IQ Test relative to others.

Your Intellectual Type is Word Warrior. This means you have exceptional verbal skills. You can easily make sense of complex issues and take an unusually creative approach to solving problems. Your strengths also make you a visionary. Even without trying you're able to come up with lots of new and creative ideas. And that's just a small part of what we know about you from your test results. 

http://www.vanishingtattoo.com/

girl, interrupted. eat your heart out.
i was stalking jd's xanga and found her very sane results from a online personality disorder test, apparently hon, i am not as stable as your ass. :p
Your Results:
Disorder Rating
Paranoid: Low
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: High
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Low
Histrionic: Moderate
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: Low
Dependent: Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate






 

its going right there! pheonix rising from my love spot. 

inamorata, tangilbly intangible.